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Traumatising

June 18, 2012

Teaching big kids has its own challenges and perks.

But today, it was traumatising…

Imagine teaching about the nutrition of goat’s milk from the reading comprehension passage, and your 17 year old ‘most of the time cuckoo’ boy shouting, ”Saya suka minum susu dada!!!!’

What will your response be?

At first, i brushed it off saying, “Is it? Good, when I see your mother, I will let her know.”

The class laughed.

He didn’t stop.

“Tokse susu mak. Saya suka susu dada gewe!”

(translation: I don’t want my mum’s milk. I like my girlfriend’s breast milk!’

Boiling inside, and before I could come with a good comeback…. He used both his hands, and demonstrated the action of squeezing….

That was it.

Sternly, I asked him to stop… ignored him, and continued with the lesson.

.

Later, I went to talk to the ustazahs about this… and they told me that he had been caught ‘touching’ with his 15 year old girlfriend, in the corner of the school!!! So they are not surprise if these kids have been fondling and whatnot. Although they said they will look into this and talk to the girl too, I was really down… A lil broken inside too… What has happened to our kids? Our highschool crushes or rendezvous used to be so simple and innocent, but now, even in this Islamic state, students are getting so sexual, not knowing the consequences.

.

I was talking to these few boys from my weaker class. They told me they want to marry their sweethearts right after they finish SPM. I was shocked!

To them, marriage has become the license, to be intimate with their partner. To finally ‘become a man’. There was no thought at all about how they are going to support the wife and family. Well, in their defense they said they will get a job in the shops nearby or work at their parents’ farm or continue rubber tapping. I have no discrimination against those who work and earn an honest living, but I can’t help but feel sad that I had failed to inspire them to be more than what they are right now. And never before happened, I teared. The girls saw and were shocked but I quickly wiped off the watery eyes (and smudged the eye liner a lil) and composed myself.

After the class, the girls all lined up, to salam and kiss my hand, and they told me.. “Teacher, jange sedih..”

and with that,

I told them, “Jangan putus asa, sebab saya tidak putus asa untuk mengajar kamu lagi. ok?”

They nodded.

Could be the haze,

as our eyes felt watery again.

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. June 19, 2012 9:39 pm

    u are so strong, felicia.

    • June 21, 2012 6:17 pm

      not really. God gives me strength. I know you are strong too 🙂

  2. Haidar permalink
    June 20, 2012 4:49 am

    Hi Felicia,

    Just passing by your blog and I couldn’t help it but empathize with you. I’m a teacher in a rural school somewhere in Malaysia and I face the same problem – with young kids (mind you), not teenagers. Imagine young kids saying words and doing things that could be rated a PG-18 (or maybe 21). They too had the same goal, to get married quickly and start the same cycle that their parents did – sell vegetables, work in factories etc. To make it simple, their ambitions were short.

    We all promote marriage but not this way. I was broken hearted when they told me their ambitions. But, knowing their background, I know the reason. It was too much exposure of the wrong thing but very little exposure of the right thing. And some of the reason came from their environments – parents and relatives. I’m not saying that their parents are wrong or try to dictate them to educate their children, but, if kids can see/hear the things their parents do behind the doors of their rooms and tell it to their friends and try to do it with their friends, something must be done aite?

    So, I feel that we need to start to re-educate these kids from the beginning. Those teens you were talking about didn’t get those negative exposure when they reached puberty, they probably get it when they are still in their age of ‘innocence’. As a fellow educator, I’ll try to do my part for the kids and I hope you don’t give up on them. Educate them morals, don’t wait for the ustazah’s to do that, we do it, even if we teach subjects that is a far cry from moral/religious-based subjects (Pend. Islam, Moral Studies etc.).

    I hope we all can inspire these kids to be productive, morally just and educated generation. Don’t lose hope because hope is where the heart is.

    God bless.

    • June 21, 2012 6:25 pm

      Haidar,

      You said it well. Couldn’t agree more. In fact, when the students told me ‘gapo nak belajo tinggi. buke sumo bole jadi engineer ke, doktor ke. keno ado ore toreh getah.’, i replied ‘siapa kamu untuk tentukan dah masa depan kamu. Tugas kamu untuk belajar sungguh sungguh, belajar benda baik… pastu tengok apa rezeki yang Tuhan bagi. Belajar ni bukan pasal nak kerja je. Bila jadi mak ayah orang, kamu perlu berpendidikan, baru boleh ajar anak kamu dengan elok, ataupun tolong mereka belajar.’

      So where do you teach? Wishing you all the best and may us continue to strive in our fields.

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